Dance of Life and Death – the theme of this year Buddhafiled festival and the theme of my life in the past few months and years. Different philosophies and religions have theories that can give some answers about life and death but still, we have to find the way of moving through this entwined dance for ourselves. A few months ago I’ve completed  ”The art of dying” course that helped me to understand the concept of death from the Tibetan Buddhism perspective. I learnt about Bardo, experienced clinical death-like state that we were guided through by our teacher and learnt how to help someone in the process of dying. Yet, when my father passed away two months ago, my world collapsed and I had to find my way through the grief. All I’ve learnt was useful but did not take the pain away. Nothing can, there are no words from dear friends that can take the pain away. Many people don’t know how to be with someone who is grieving, they want to be helpful but don’t know how. We can only understand it if we’ve been through it, and still every and each of us will have different experience of grief. Psychologically, when both of our parents dies, we become orphans, no matter our age. Family constellation isn’t the same anymore, there is no one standing in the front of us in the line, we become adults. This is how I feel, or at least part of me – my inner child is lost without my mum and dad and I’m trying to navigate in the world and learning it again, trying to nurture my inner child and at the same time to walk my path as an adult woman. It’s a complex situation, yet so natural, it’s our life cycle. Coming so close with death through loss of our dear ones or through a terminal illness brings us closer to life. I pray to find strength through this difficult time so I can live this life that my parents gave me fully, so their gift isn’t wasted. I’m connecting in my prayers with all of you who is grieving in this moment. Blessings ??